photography

i started doing photography (albeit, on a much less serious level) when i was 14. i've always loved and felt very connected with nature- i have memories of myself as a toddler thanking the trees for creating a canopy over the road from each side of the street. i have always found joy in my surroundings this way. when i was 15, i finally had a phone with me and was able to capture those moments as they happened. i began to let myself capture that joy when i felt it, ironically around the same time the mental illess started to kick in.

well, i mean. i've had a severe anxiety disorder since i was 11, so by that point it had been kicked in for multiple years. but i think that 15 was probably one of my lowest points. i finally got given some therapy, although my therapist was Not great. you know all of those things people tell you will make you feel better when you're depressed? all those things like "go and get some exercise!!" "get some sleep!!" "have a cup of tea!!" i feel that, a lot of the time, those things are really empty. like you can tell me to go and make a cup of tea, and it's true that doing so will get me out of bed, but like. now i'm just depressed and holding a cup of tea.